Playing pretend
I'm manic right now. On days when I am manic, I can't stop trying to fix things. In one day, I have replaced a broken floorboard, repaired the lawn mower pull chord, cleaned out the refrigerator, moved a pile of wood, and other stuff I can't remember. When I am manic, my brain is a bit scattered as well. I titled this post playing pretend because when I'm like this, I pretend I'm fine. I put a "mask" on that is all smiles to hide the sadness I am feeling. Sometimes it's more a loniless than a sadness or a mix of the two. I realize that if I hide behind a mask of I'm fine, no one will know how I feel. I did something I usually don't do...I actually said the words "I'm sad and don't know why" to my husband when he got home from work. I didn't want to unpack my crap on him after he worked all day, but I needed to tell someone. I truly don't know why I am sad. I just know I am. It'll last a few days and I'll push t...